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from time to time i send out some very funny emails compiled from the weeks events.... but then again some are just soft and silly here is just a small selection
diz iz for allz thoze peepz out there whoz wanted to see me da
ali gore winz
if id had won da ellection then iz would have freed cann and biss
iz would have made it so that da only bush waz sittin on meez
beast
iz hads nothin againzt da w bush but bush bellongs on my beast
orz meez faze ((punani )) toz all zem outz zhere who poked da
wronz holes allz i gottaz zay iz that iz would pok holes iz poke
bitches iz juzt dozent come down wid da first aids if i wonz da
election then i wouldnt go handin out all da aids to the thrid
world country iz would have been given all ze aids to joo
# tis the season to kill bill gates falla falla la la la la
wit an ak47 falla falla la la la la la
c4 m16 doesnt really mater eather way
tis the season to kill bill gates falla falla la la la la #
some times heavy millitary transport aircraft need to take off
from short runways. if they cant manage to do this under there
own power then they use jet assisted take off (JATO) not so long
a go the highway potrol in arizona descovered a pile of twisted
metal in a cliff face, at first they just thought that it was a
small air craft what had crashed but upon further inspection it
turned out to be a 1967 chevy impala. a few days ( and many
donuts )later the police figued out how it got ther now the
driver of this chevy had bolted a JATO to his car he then started
out along a strait road then he did the one of the last things he
would ever do he fired the JATO the car accelerated from around
50 mph to 400 in 5 seconds two and a half miles later police
found a thick rubber tire tracs along the road . this was the
last but one thing he would ever do.... he aplied his brakes and
they just bust . so lets sum up .... traveling at around 400 mph
tires burst... so he now has no control over the car then he hits
a cerve in the road ( well when i say hit i mean go strait
through ) bang and thats the stopry of the bad year ! now no
matter how much fun this seems at the time dont try this at home
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
british nuclear fuels were a wee bit suprised when they recived a
fax from a second hand car dealer called tom in idaho, offering
them first refusel on a pre-owned nuclear fuel reprocessing plant
, complete with instruction manual. i can only assume that the
previous owner a little old granny that they used to vapourise
anybody trying to take her place in church the american goverment
were worried about if a certen evil dictator got his hands on it.
maybe the US goverement should have thought about this before the
sold it to tom any one whishing to have a cruis should give the
pentagon a ring they might sell you one !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
duing the second world war the US goverment invested millions of
dollers in trying to develop a bat bomb . the theroy behind this
is that the littel robents would fly into enemy teritory and dorp
the bomb ... what accualy happened is that the only thing they
blew you was the airforce hanger and the genrals car
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
4 friend from west virginia being quite drunk decided to ply
chickin by laying between two rail road tracks and letting the
train pass over them. sadly the train this day had a snowplough
attached to the front !
ken burger 47 had only been a sleep for an hour hen his phone
rang he reached out to answer it but instead picked up a smith
and weaston and shot him self
a seventeen year old girl in a supermarket tryed to pass a cheque
for $189 and although she offered the cashier two pieces of id,
the cashier called trhe manager "is this you " the
manager asked "of course it is " relied the girl "
well " said the manerger " your my ex wife and you dont
look anything like her "
in 1970 voters in a town in ecuador became so confused by an
elaborate advertising campaign they elected a brand of foot
deodorant as there mayor